Safe & Sound(ish): Florida’s Condo Caper Slows the Structural Squeeze

-

 

Move over, theme-park lines—Florida’s condo owners have a new deadline to procrastinate: a one-year extension on structural integrity studies, courtesy of HB 913. 

In an effort to “listen” to residents who can’t quite stomach surprise six-figure assessments, the Legislature unanimously agreed Wednesday to tweak the post-Surfside safety laws into something more… digestible.

“Milestone Inspections”—Now with Extra Buffer
Originally due by Dec. 31 for any building three stories or taller, milestone inspections have inspired more heartburn than conch fritters at sunrise. 

Thanks to this bill, owners get an extra twelve months to hire engineers, schedule drone flyovers, and worry just a little bit less about whether their HOA will bill them for a Lamborghini-style reserve fund.

Reserve Funds on Layaway
Feeling squeamish about socking away tens of thousands for future repairs? Great news: HB 913 pauses reserve funding for two years post-inspection and bumps the “big-ticket” threshold from $10K to $25K. 

Now only your building’s more lavish disasters—like a full-blown roof collapse—qualify for savings, while that leaky balcony can go straight onto next year’s tab.

Credit Where Credit’s Due
Condo associations can now take out lines of credit or loans—if a majority of owners say “aye”—to meet their reserve obligations. In other words, your building can get the money now and talk about paying it back later. 

Because nothing says “financial flexibility” like mortgaging your shared laundry room.

Architects and Contractors, Please Raise Your Hands
To keep things “above board,” design pros and contractors must now disclose if they plan to bid on inspection-related repairs. 

In theory, this prevents your structural engineer from moonlighting as your roofer—and saves your HOA from ending up in the next “Conflict of Interest Monthly.”


Reporting Requirements: The Gift That Keeps on Giving
Local officials have until Oct. 1 to report the number of inspections completed and list any buildings deemed unsafe or uninhabitable. 

Because if there’s one thing Floridians love, it’s checking whether their high-rise neighbors have been red-flagged for imminent collapse—ideally before happy hour.

Paradise, with Side of Paperwork
Sen. Jennifer Bradley praised the compromise as “fair and workable,” while Sen. Nick DiCeglie lamented that owners face a tough choice: stick around in Florida’s sun-soaked paradise or bolt for somewhere less paperwork-intensive—like Antarctica. 

Rep. Vicki Lopez, the self-styled “Condo Queen,” hailed the bill as “financial relief,” presumably for those with vaults full of spare cash.

In short, Florida’s condos are safer than ever—just give them a minute (or three). So grab your ice-cold lemonade and relax: the only thing sinking now is your procrastination timeline.

Florida Condo Comedy: A Legal Circus Unfolds 

 

Please support my writing by donating $1 at https://buymeacoffee.com/doublejeopardynews

 

  1. #SafeAndSoundish

  2. #CondoCaper

  3. #MilestoneMishaps

  4. #ReserveFundRuckus

  5. #CreditCondo

  6. #ProcrastinationLegislated

  7. #HB913Hilarity

  8. #CondoQueenChronicles

  9. #ArchitectsInSwimTrunks

  10. #SurfsideSafetySaga

  11. #TallahasseeTweak

  12. #ThreeStoryThriller

  13. #PaperworkParadise

  14. #LayawayBuildings

  15. #DeadlineDelayDrama

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Please Help Find These Forgotten Girls Held at Male Juvenile Prison for Over a Year!

-
Image
  MY MOST IMPORTANT STORY  Dozens of Forgotten Little Girls Held at Male Juvenile Prison for Over a Year! Welcome to the Sunshine State, where the palm trees sway, the alligators lurk, and the legislative process makes Kafka look like a life coach!  Florida House Bill HB21 . Not just a compensation bill but possibly a 20 million dollar "Stay out of Jail Free" card for some folks. This is a bill that does some good—but also trips over its own shoelaces, falls down a staircase, and lands on a historical oversight so big, it might as well have its own zip code! An oversight that overlooks what I consider to be its most vulnerable victims! The Setup: Justice with a Catch HB21 was enacted on July 1, 2024 to compensate victims of abuse from two male juvenile detention facilities located in Florida, Dozier and Okeechobee.  It says, “Hey, survivors of abuse between 1940 and 1975, here’s some compensation for the horrific things you endured!” Sounds good, right? Like a...
Read more

Here's A New HOA Rule Dictating What You Can Do Inside Your Home

-
Image
HOA Overreach: When Your Own Home Isn’t Really Your Own The joys of homeownership—the American dream!  That magical place where you can paint the walls any color you like, blast your music (within reason), and enjoy the simple pleasure of—wait, never mind..... Turns out, your HOA might have something to say about what you do inside your own four walls. Case in point: A longtime homeowner, who has peacefully lived in his residence for 25 years, was blindsided when his HOA suddenly banned smoking inside individual homes.  That’s right—after a quarter-century of no issues, he was informed that lighting up indoors was no longer an option.  The new rule, passed at the HOA’s annual meeting by a majority vote, now restricts smoking to a designated outdoor area. Now, while some might see this as a health-conscious decision, the homeowner—whose wife is a smoker—sees it as an unfair overreach.  In a letter to a local publication, he expressed frustration, writing, “I’ve live...
Read more

Postal Police Stuck Behind ‘Keep Out’ Signs While Mailmen Face Muggers: You Can’t Make This Stuff Up!!

-
Image
As crime against letter carriers surges, one would think that America’s armed, uniformed Postal Police might be hitting the streets to protect our mail.  Instead, they’re still glued to their post office entrances like sentries guarding Fort Frownmore.  Why?  Because since 2020, the Postmaster General decreed they must “protect postal property” only—meaning, they currently serve as glorified lobby bouncers rather than actual roaming guardians of the mailstream. “ They’re robbing letter carriers, they’re sticking a gun in a letter carrier’s face and they’re demanding arrow keys, ” laments Frank Albergo , president of the National Postal Police Union and a Postal Police Officer himself.  An "arrow key" in the context of the Post Office is a specialized, universal key that postal workers use to access various locked mail receptacles, including collection boxes, apartment mailboxes, and cluster boxes. Albergo isn’t exaggerating—research shows over 100 physical assaul...
Read more