How Florida Farmers Got Squeezed Out Like Day-Old OJ: The USMCA

 

Today, we venture into a juicy topic—and by juicy, I mean citrus-level juicy, with just a hint of bitterness.

 We’re talking about the NAFTA replacement, the United States–Mexico–Canada Agreement or USMCA trade deal—aka “NAFTA with a spray tan.”

Now, on paper, this deal is supposed to be the answer to all of America’s problems. Farmers, manufacturers, unions, chocolate lovers—Trump said it’s “good for everybody.” Well, except, apparently, for fresh fruit and vegetable farmers. You know, the people responsible for the actual food on your plate.
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Let's Break it Down

The USMCA is like a potluck dinner where everyone brings a dish... except Florida farmers, who are told, ‘Oh, sorry, we already ordered takeout from Mexico. But thanks for trying!’ I mean, Florida used to be the orange grove of the world. Now it’s the land of Orange Julius in the mall food court where the groves used to be.”

And it’s not just oranges, folks. Florida’s family-run farms are vanishing faster than your uncle’s dignity during Thanksgiving dinner debates. Why? Because international markets are flooding the shelves with blueberries, strawberries, and other produce at prices so low, it’s like they’re auditioning for Walmart’s clearance bin.

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Let’s Talk Numbers  

In 2018, blueberries from Mexico made up 60% of the U.S. market. Sixty percent! That’s more than the approval rating of Baby Yoda—and Baby Yoda had universal appeal. Mexican blueberries are cheaper, too, because they’re grown with lower labor costs and fewer regulations.

U.S. farmers are out here struggling to compete, while Mexico is playing Farmville on "Easy Mode"!

So now, U.S. farmers are thinking, ‘If you can’t beat them, join them.’ They’re investing in berry farms... in Mexico!  

It’s like if Starbucks decided to outsource coffee roasting to Dunkin’ Donuts—completely missing the point of why we like them in the first place!

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"Love: American - Tariff Style" 

And let’s not ignore the irony of it all. The Trump administration loved tariffs—tariffs on steel, on Chinese goods, on Canada’s maple syrup! But when it comes to fresh fruits and vegetables? Crickets.
Which, by the way, might be our new protein source if this keeps up.

The timing couldn’t be worse. We just survived a pandemic that should’ve been a wake-up call. Relying on foreign imports for our food is like relying on Wi-Fi at a rural motel—it’s unpredictable, and eventually, you’re eating Cheetos for dinner. _____________________________________________________________________________

Final Thoughts

So, here’s my modest proposal: slap some tariffs on fresh fruits and veggies! 

Protect American farmers! Level the playing field! And while we’re at it, maybe invest in a blueberry mascot—a cute one, with a catchy slogan. Something like, “Buy American Berries: They’re Sweet, Not Sour!”

Because at the end of the day, if we don’t stand up for family farms, who’s going to grow our food? 

Walmart? Elon Musk? A TikTok Influencer with a hydroponic garden? No thanks.

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